Coping up is what I am doing now and it is never easy. I, The Buco Boy that you used to know still has the same set of problems until now. I am definitely starting from scratch again. (That's the symbolism
I am talking about in my last post hehe ) The impulsive guy that I am, I decided to resign from my present company because of growing burdens especially to the Finance Department. When work seems to be a natural motivation to strive more, my work had become a burden. Day by day the money that was alloted for my personal savings has been used for my expenses for my work. In my line of work, I am usually out in the field roaming around to my assigned areas, asking and talking to doctors and patients to get these products i promote so that I can reach my monthly quotas. In our field, it is normal for a company to provide food and travel allowances to their employees which one thing that my company partly don't do;partly because these allowances I am talking about are always not on time.
It has become a burden since I cannot save at all. Some of my "money" weren't returned to me YET. (Actually I am still hoping they're going to give it back but who knows??? sometimes companies can really become nasty .They won't care anymore because you are no longer connected to them. ) That is why I've passed my resignation letter and decided to move out to find a well-established, good paying company that can support my survival in the city.
Deciding things like this was never easy. I am living alone here in Manila and when you're bankrupt it is really like living hell. It is very stressful, so you'll do your best to survive, especially when you don't have any support system who can save you in your most hahaha weariest times.
I never expected that things can be more tough this time. I was very confident when I passed my resignation that i can land to a new job quickly. But hell no, I've already passed a lot of applications via Jobstreet and others websites this week but few companies called and worse , most of them offer job interviews for positions which are included in my list as last resorts.
There are times when I ride a bus or a train after retiring from a long day that I let my mind drift away from all the stresses of life.; moments like going back home after tiring work or from a failed job interview , I allow my mind to ponder and try to absorb what went good or bad for that day.
Today was no different. I just came home from a failed attempt to win a good paying job. I went out from my house this morning welcomed a brand new day, ready, confident to face my interviewer and to sign a new job offer after a successful interview. I went to the battle today ready to conquer all but that moment when the interviewer closed the door of that particular room ,something has started to take control of me; When I started to answer her questions ,my voice became shaky and I began to stammer; my hands were cold as ice and my heartbeat seemed faster than normal. Fear and nervousness enveloped me and it eat me whole killing my chance for a good life .
And so I am writing this article just for the sake of mending my hurt ego and yeah so that you guys can have an article to reflect on. Tomorrow another job interview awaits, hopefully this time it will be good. For sure that will be a great news! It will just mean a new thing for me .No more ground zero for Rico DB.